Vail Goes Dirtbag

The sun is out, the mud has dried up, and strangers are once again flooding the streets and filling out the night scene in my small mountain town. The off season has turned back on and the GoPro Mountain Games last weekend rang-in the official start to the summer.

Welcome back tourists. Would you like fries with that?

It’s a thought provoking experience, riding out the recession in a resort town. I have more friends than I can count using their college degrees to serve coffee to people who have more disposable income to spend in a few days than the average student's total loan debt (the current average is somewhere around $24,000).  By contrast, the average family of four who vacations in Vail spends around $30,000 for a week long vacation.

$30,000 for ONE week.

That’s $4,285 a day. 178 an hour. Approximately 3 dollars every minute.

I just got upset because I had to pay a 3 dollar fine on a dvd I returned late to the library.

Ski resorts are expensive places to visit and Vail ranks in as not only the most expensive resort in the country, but as the number one most expensive place to visit in the United States. Even in the summer.

Of course, not everyone spends $30,000 when they visit, but generally, the folks who vacation in this town have got some dough to spend. The Mountain Games are an exception.  These are peanut butter and jelly folks, camp-out in their car folks: dirtbag as it gets in Vail, Colorado. And I love them.

Granted, I don't have to work for tips.

So what's the trick to spending a weekend in Vail without breaking the bank?

Accommodations: Hotel rates are well into the hundreds around here. Don't stay in them. The best thing to do is to tell someone at the bar you're a pro-athlete and surf their...couch. Unfortunately, that doesn't always work. Fortunately, there are plenty of places to park your car or set up your tent and sleep for free. Over the weekend, people were spotted grilling and drinking 40s in the parking structure. The structure is free in the summer, but the ground slants and no one wants to sleep at an angle all night, plus, well, it's CEMENT. Better off driving up Red Sandstone or some forest land road and finding an open place to set up camp.

Food and Entertainment: Events like the Mountain Games provide an amazing assortment of free stuff. First of all, the spectating is one hundred percent free, and that can basically take up the entire weekend, and if you play your cards right, you can get yourself into a couple after parties that give out free beer and white zinfandel. Various venders peddle all sorts of goodies from braided survival rope key chains (do people ever really use those?), to granola bars and sports drink samples, collecting free stuff can not only score you plenty of repetitive calories, it also provides free entertainment. Just think of it like a scavenger hunt. Don't think you can survive off of samples all weekend? Just think about how much easier it is for you to get drunk when you buy happy hour beers before the free concerts!
But, if you absolutely MUST buy some food to eat, there are a few restaurants in Vail that are not ridiculously over priced. These are La Cantina (conveniently located in the transportation center next to public bathrooms, 'hello' showering in the sink), where you can buy a burrito combo for under 10 bucks and eat all the chips and salsa you can handle, Vendetta's, which features a 3 dollar cheese slice, Loaded Joes, whose mac-n-cheese will put you back a few dollars, and, if you're into pizza and willing to take the hike all the way across the interstate, Local Joes has got pies and drinks for cheap**.

Last weekend all of these places were SLAMMED. Obviously, these Mountain Games visitors have got it figured out.

Dirtbags, I salute you! Drink your 40s in the parking garage, leave large tipping to our regular costumers, you bring some flavor to the snow globe and though you don't exactly live that 'real life' my parents are still warning me about, I admire that you don't stroll across the street in full length fur coats. Granted, maybe it's just too warm...

Let’s shake it up, summer is here!

Odds are, it's gonna be good.

**Respective businesses please feel free to compensate me for this advertising (which reaches a plethora of readers ;)) via complimentary drinks and meals.